in Ask Jester

Welcome to Jestertunes! If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Feel free to leave a comment, read through the archives, and enjoy yourself. See you again real soon!

Dutchbitch had the Interview Meme up last night and I was feeling particularly brave, so I opted in. She sent me the following questions.

1. “Hire Me” - Tell me why I should hire you?

You should hire me because I am thorough, dedicated, and able to multi-task like a pro. I perform well in stressful situations, and will persevere for much longer than lesser men are able. I am honest to a fault, outspoken, and personable. I think outside the box and approach problem solving from many angles. I’m able to adapt my position and rhythm to match those of my co-worker(s). Wait… exactly what kind of job are we talking about?

2. What kinda Sushi place makes Creme Brulee?

Well, the place is called “Wasabi 201.” The food is very good, and the sushi chef believes that the presentation of a dish is just as important as the flavor. The rolls are always creatively decorated to look like caterpillars or flowers or abstract sculptures. The creme brulee comes out with skillfully arranged kiwi and strawberry slices and sugar sculptures on the top of them. Delightful.

Man. I’m hungry.

3. Your ideal cast for the remake of the legendary “Sound of Music”?

Oh man, this is gonna be hard. Couldn’t you have picked a show with a smaller cast!?

Captain Von Trapp	Maria	Mother Superior
Kevin Spacey	Minnie Driver	Maggie Smith
The Baroness	Max	Herr Zeller
Emma Thompson	Kevin Kline	Anthony Hopkins
Rolfe	Liesl	Friederich
Jamie Bell	Mandy Moore	Daniel Radcliffe
Louisa	Kurt	Briggita
Emily Browning	Frankie Muniz	Dakota Fanning
Marta	Gretl
Elle Fanning	Some annoyingly cute little girl

4. Had you been Oprah, would you’ve allowed Tom to jump on your couch like a maniac during broadcast?

Yes, in fact, I would have encouraged him. I would have egged him on and worked him up into a lather until he was stripping his clothes off, foaming at the mouth and proclaiming the truth about his relationship with the pool boy. Then he would have peeled his face back to reveal the grey-green alien head underneath. I could then retire from all the tabloid money and would be forever known as the hero that saved civilization from one of its greatest evils.

5. What was the biggest tip ever left in the Tip Jar?

Uh. Er. Hmm. Let’s just say that I used the cash to buy a fabulously tasty treat at McDonald’s. I enjoyed it very much.

********

Wanna play along?

1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Anyone brave enough to let me interview them?

 

Wow! You really went all out replying to my questions. They are great! Thanks for playing and the cast of the All New Sound Of Music is guh-reat!

DutchBitch wrote on April 18th, 2007 at 9:12 am

 

 

Dutchy - Thanks for the questions. That was fun:)

jester wrote on April 18th, 2007 at 2:40 pm

 

 

lol! love your answer to #5….

I so with you on #4. I kept hoping he’d fall off the couch and crack his skull on the floor to reveal his alien interior!! I just know there’s antennas under there!!

webmiztris wrote on April 18th, 2007 at 4:09 pm

 

 

love your sound of music choices. feel you are being unfair to aliens by suggesting tc belongs to one of them. too chicken to be interviewed by you as of yet, maybe another time after i’ve had a chance to read more of your stuff. bd understands that my level of techno ignorance stems from fear and was able to walk me through the whole linking thing. so that will be fixed soon.

heather wrote on April 18th, 2007 at 4:37 pm

 

 

Would you do one set of questions for both me and Killer or would you customize?

Liz wrote on April 18th, 2007 at 5:57 pm

 

 

webmiztris - Thanks. I contemplated number 5 almost as long as I did the Sound of Music question. I’m sure Tom Cruise has an antenna, but I would bet you a million dollars that it’s tiny.

heather - You may be right that I am insulting the aliens. I hope they can forgive me. Wow, am I that scary that you couldn’t be interviewed by me!? Muhahahah.

Liz - I think I’d have to do at least two different sets of questions. One for each of you… and it might be fun to do a set for BOTH of you to answer together… like a Newlywed Game interview.

jester wrote on April 19th, 2007 at 2:50 am

 

 

i’m a chicken like that. it took me a few weeks before i could even comment over at bd’s place and he’s one of the more laid back bloggers i read.

heather wrote on April 19th, 2007 at 2:44 pm

 

 

Okay, I am in, interview the crew at Killer Rants.

Killer wrote on April 19th, 2007 at 4:58 pm

 

 

heather - why be a chicken? It’s the internet where you can be almost entirely anonymous!

Killer - I’ll get right on your list of questions. I’ll need Liz’s email address. I promise I’ll only sign her up for the most tasteful of porn spam.

jester wrote on April 19th, 2007 at 5:08 pm

 

Say something already!