I’m really tired of keeping my mouth shut. I’ve been watching, horrified, for months while people continue to redefine the term “inappropriate.”
I hate hypocrites.
I loathe arrogance.
I despise people who abuse the trust and insult the intelligence of their readers and friends.
So with that, I present to you the things I’ve learned in a very small dysfunctional corner of the internet:
- It’s perfectly justifiable to ask your sycophants to contribute to your anniversary fund to buy your husband a motorcycle when unemployment is at record highs, your friends are having their homes foreclosed on, are being laid off from their jobs or struggling with health problems almost sure to bankrupt them.
- No one will notice this request for money is on a blog full of stories about how much money you make as a super busy writer, how much you spend on your hair, shoes, and trips because you’re just so darn cute and likable!
- It’s perfectly ok to repeatedly and publicly write stories that paint your spouse in a negative light… stories that make all your fans cluck their tongues and commiserate with you for having to run your household with no help whatsoever, with having to deal with mountains of insensitive slights against you while you play the role of the helpless and innocent damsel in distress.
- It’s acceptable to peer down your nose and cast judgment on friends who have had an extra-marital affair, even when you are yourself guilty of having an extra-marital affair.
- It’s “good friendship” to constantly remind your friends of their past mistakes.
- Refusing to stop seeing the man you cheated with because he is your “best friend” and boss, despite how hurt and angry it makes your husband, is normal and acceptable behavior.
- Posting photos of your husband with his arm around the man you are cheating with and labeling it “My Boys” is the new funniest thing ever!
- It’s ok to make everything about yourself, even your family’s bad choices.
- There are no repercussions for questioning the sincerity of all the friends and strangers who offer you prayers and well wishes.
- There are, however, repercussions for directly commenting on how shitty questioning that sincerity really is – you get twitter dumped and facebook unfriended.
- High school rules never go away – you can’t be friends with me because you’re friends with him, and I don’t like him, so you must not like him, or I won’t like you. Or something like that.
- The best way to control your friends is by hiring them and being responsible for their livelihoods. They won’t disagree with you, they’ll keep your secrets, and they will put up with incredibly inappropriate behavior because they are dependent on your money.
- Putting other people down and reminding them of their flaws at every opportunity hides how really insecure and immature you are.
- Your self worth should be tied to your fancy college degree, or lack thereof.
- Artists and musicians contribute nothing to society, or at least much less than a law degree, whether or not the holder of the law degree actually practices law or uses it in anyway.
- There’s no reason to think that commenting on every post your girlfriend makes might make her husband feel bad.
- You should always express your deepest and most private feelings for your married girlfriend via whimsical stories of dragons and princesses, because your readers are far too stupid to ever figure out what you are really talking about.
- Allowing the people around you to rise above their emotional hurdles and improve their lives is ill-advised because it exposes your own weaknesses and faults.
- Being kind of a big deal on the internet excuses even the most reprehensible behavior. So does italics.
- Sometimes, all you need is a dildo with a suction cup attachment and some hand sanitizer to make it all better.
The fact that I ever hung out in that corner of the world wide web makes me feel unclean.
The fact that people will still continue to ooh and aah and heap praise on them makes me sad.
The fact that people will come here and insult me for posting this amuses me, if only because defending the indefensible is normally humorous.
Why is it my business? Because my friends have been forced to defend their friendship with me, as if *I* am the immoral asshole in this equation.
That and I’m already being accused of gossiping. I’d rather be hated for what I’ve done, rather than what people assume I have done.
PS: I still don’t really like you but you’ve come a long way in my esteem. What you said about me had no merit whatsoever…especially because you were dead wrong…but at least you are making some attempt at possibly helping some poor soul from being used and deceived by them.
Donna – We totally don’t have to be butt buddies or anything, but apparently there is apparently some truth to “the enemy of my enemy is my friend.” I’m ok with being moderately disliked. heh.
You two are starting to scare me with all this niceness towards each other. The internet is looking for its next big drama, you know… keep this up, and you two might just be it!
LMAO!
.-= Sheila´s last blog ..Every 10 Years =-.
Sheila – I can assure you beyond all shadow of a doubt that my illicit affair will not be with Donna. Unless “Donna” is the alter-ego of Joseph Gordon-Levitt or Mario Lopez. Then, maybe.
Sheila –
Ew. Just Ew. I never want to see Donna and Jester as friends. They have such an amazing hate/hate relationship. The mere fact that they agree on this is surely a sign that the apocalypse is nigh. LOL
.-= CP´s last blog ..About the Drama…last words on the subject. =-.
Don’t worry, Sheila…I don’t think you’ll be picking up a paper and seeing, “THIS JUST IN! Paul and Donna..BFFs wearing matching hoodies!”
And while I am a huge grudge holder, I’m much better with a half-assed apology than none at all. I also am down with making mistakes that you wish you’d never made and I don’t begrudge a person making a mistake when the harm was only to me an no one else.
And I absolutely adore being right and innocent of all charges and rubbing it in his bitchy little face.
Since I got that chance, I’m all over forgiveness. Heh.
Donna – So that’s a no on the hoodies, then? Fuck.
How about this — I do apologize for my part of the proportions to which our previous disagreements were blown. As for the validity of those arguments more than two years later, I can only say were they real and valid to me at the time. I think that qualifies as a “half-assed” apology, yes?
OMG. And I was totally ready to put a tip jar on my page to get you guys those hoodies too. *sighs*
.-= CP´s last blog ..About the Drama…last words on the subject. =-.
Apology accepted.
And maybe to the hoodies but only if they’re pink with Hello Kitty and lots of sparklies on them.
I think pink Hello Kitty sparklies may possibly work on both of you… Although, I’ve never seen either of you. LOL!
.-= Sheila´s last blog ..Every 10 Years =-.
Donna – You’ve obviously been digging around in my closet.
Let me get this straight, Britt cheated on Jared with Adam? I thought from the sound of things, Jared cheated on Britt! There was one post where she opened her email and cried noo! And everyone came rushing to her side to console her. I came to the conclusion that the email she read was a love letter or something like that between Jared and another woman because not long after that she kicked him out – I may have my time line wrong a bit, but I’m not going to back and read all her posts. It seemed to me that some of her posts alluded to Jared having had cheated on her. So, I believed Jared was cheating on her and she was giving him a second chance. Man did I have it wrong! I feel very duped by her. If she would sell out her husband to make herself look like the martyr, imagine what she would/will and has done to her friends. I would tread lightly around her. I will say this though, she is a gifted writer, she knows how spin better than the FOX news network and that is some kind of talent.
Adam is a douche. How anyone that could respect him after him cheating with Britt knowing that she already had a troubled marriage and being such a close friend to her family. That is what kills me! It’s not like Adam was some random guy that Britt picked up off the street because she felt lonely, Adam is a close friend to the family and that puts the affair in a whole different ballgame. He knew exactly was he was doing and who he would be hurting.
Kathey – Jared *kissed* another woman during their separation. That was the whole “woe is me” post that you remember. Though it was written in such a way that you would be right to think that he had just had an orgy with three hookers and sired a gay baby with one.
I need to back up. For the record Britt, Jared, Amy nor Adam have ever done anything to me. Also they’re not now, ever have or will be my friends. Their lives have zero effect on my own. It’s my fault for being upset and about their actions. I could have clicked the X and have for years at a time. I read them occasionally because I like drama when I’m not involved and they are full of it. Same reason I read those kinds of books. However this isn’t a book about fictional characters. They’re real people with real problems who made very real mistakes. While I don’t agree with them carrying on with this behavior, it’s not my place to throw stones at them either. I’ve made big mistakes in my life and also have more than I deserve. With that said, I’m done and wish those involved, upset and hurt the best. May we all learn from our mistakes. Jester I especially wish you the best because I honestly believe it was your morals that prompted this post, not spite.
Sam – I think the argument could be made that their sites are works of fiction, given the circumstances.
Ahhh…laughing last really is best!
Not to mention, being right about someone (some several people) all along.
I am near the area this whole crew runs in. I am more of a casual observer, not cool enough to be invited to the prom…
But not even being involved, I suspected all along what you posted was happening.
I agree with what many people have said, I would NEVER post about my husband in a derogatory manner or defile my marriage for blog sponsors.
When you post your dirty laundry, you have to be prepared for it to be flung back at you. That goes for everyone in life. Also don’t claim to be this raw open book and bullshit all of us.
I don’t know Jared at all, but for the love of God, man up.
notcoolenough – Sounds like you have a bit more class than others in that part of Florida.
You may not have made the cut in the Orlando mafia. Apparently, I didn’t either, despite being told by both of them how much I meant to them.
However, I do live an hour away…and we can start out own little la familia! LOL You are always welcome in casa de CP.
PS: I have all the nice beaches over here in Tampa Bay. Who needs Disney?
.-= CP´s last blog ..About the Drama…last words on the subject. =-.
I feel sick reading this. Really ill. They have a “friend” who is really struggling right now and this seems like a bitch slap to the face. Not that I think that is makes a difference.
notcoolenough – You’re right.. it doesn’t make any difference. Obliviousness is a shared trait on that side of the blog pond.
Yes, they certainly had a friend who was struggling alright.
But, that friend is in a better place now and surrounded by those who loved and cared enough to make sure that happened…
without a tip jar.
.-= CP´s last blog ..About the Drama…last words on the subject. =-.
Do any of you find it interesting they have not acknowledged the “milestone”?
Connie – She did make a vague tweet about her excitement about it… but no post. She knows it’s going to open a can of worms.
I can’t believe she had the balls to beg for money for a luxury item and then not say thank you for it. Sigh.
What I find *most* interesting about all the backlash, emails, comments, and discussion around is that not one person has questioned or denied the truthfulness of the affair revelation.
That tells me *everyone knew* it was happening and no one had the nuts to speak up about it.
And if everyone already knew this information, why then are they blaming one person in particular for “spilling their secrets?”
Doesn’t that prove that their readers aren’t nearly as stupid and clueless as the dynamic duo assumes they are?
Let’s say, for hahas, that you’re gay. You haven’t told anyone. It’s personal. But everyone suspects you are. Even though they do suspect you are gay, no one outs you because to do so would not only be very rude, but would also be encroaching your personal life.
Then, suddenly, someone you know outs you via a blog post, even though you weren’t ready.
I’m not at all defending what they did. I just think it was wrong of you to breach their personal issues and announce it. You keep saying, “Their readers aren’t that stupid,” but neither are yours. The little clues you wrote are pretty obvious, and only someone who didn’t read either of their blogs would remain oblivious.
Woah, woah, hang on a minute. Are you trying to equate having an affair and misrepresenting your husband so that your readers think HE cheated on YOU and treated YOU like garbage to being GAY?
I think we can all see the big difference there. I think it’s about time someone stood up and told the truth about Jared. It’s getting old watching people virtually hold her hand and pat her on the back for being treated so poorly. Who has represented Jared’s side in anything? No one. Would you want someone you care about to be made to look like a jerk when they are really the victim?
Elizabeth Kaylene – Since I *am* gay, I think I can answer this question quite well… if I were writing about my life and portraying myself to be anti-gay religious zealot who goes gay bashing on the weekends, I think my readers/fans/sycophants have the moral and ethical duty to out me as a hypocrite. And if I were accepting donations to buy my “wife” breast implants, I think my readers/fans/sycophants should have the stones to call me a fraud.
He absolutely, positively did NOT announce their affair. Neither did another one of their friends who was accused of that. The people who announced the affair were the same people who were having the affair. I’m sorry, but all you had to do was read either blog for no more than a couple of months to know better. They outed themselves. Perhaps they didn’t realize it…but they certainly did. They made some VERY public gestures in front of others, specifically at his Halloween party where Jared was strangely absent from.
Even my husband noticed…and my husband never notices ANY thing like that.
Their secret was told to a number of people, any number of which could have spilled the beans. Jester was certainly NOT the first to talk about it and undoubtedly will not be the last.
.-= CP´s last blog ..About the Drama…last words on the subject. =-.
Elizabeth, Adam has “outted” more people than you might know. Not in the gay outting kind of way but he had no problem offering Heather up as a sacrifice to the internet whatsoever. He posted various people’s names, addresses and other personal information when it wasn’t his business to do so. While everyone I wanted to know knew my name, address and phone number, he didn’t think that was good enough and felt the need to put my name out there when I did not want it to be. I don’t have anything to hide because I really am what I present myself to be, I just did not want my name to be public knowledge. I don’t have any dirty, little secrets so no real damage was done to me.
He & Britt on the other hand…smoke and mirrors. When you pretend to be something that you’re not, it will come back to bite you on your fat, hair ass. You cannot present yourself as honourable, ethical, moral and superior when you are none of those things. You will be found out, and when you have secrets, you will be damaged.
I don’t know about you, but I kinda see it as a “what goes around, comes around” thing. When you fuck with people eventually you will be fucked with.
So, if what you think Jester did was not right, then times it by 6 and turn it right back around on Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum because they’ve done far more to fuck with people…far more.
One wrong does not make a right but you can only push people so far, you can only lie and deceive so much before someone gets tired of it.
If this post was a lie, then yeah, maybe I would agree with you but it’s not and he was pushed to write this post because of their actions. Rather than come out and be open with what they did, rather than just shut up and move along, they shoved the knife in his back.
When you have secrets you wish to keep, you mighta oughtta want to be extra nice to the people in the know.
You may not be aware of this but THEY are the ones who let their affair be public knowledge because they told people and as I said, when you have a secret that can come back and bite you, you really do want to be nice to the people who know it.
Elizabeth Kaylene-
Oh PLEASE.
You can’t compare someone keeping the secret of being gay, to two people, BOTH OF WHOM ARE MARRIED, having an extramarital affair. That’s absolutely ridiculous !
Not to mention, their whole “Transparency and honesty”, “I use my blog to HELP people”, “I use my real name on the internet so you really KNOW me”, and all their other holier-than-thou bullshit lies.
.-= annie´s last blog ..I’m a Twit =-.
Annie – My issue has never really been “THE AFFAIR” itself. God knows I don’t care who gets their dicks wet wherever. My issue has always been the hypocrisy of pointing fingers and damaging other people’s reputations that they felt superior to. Plus the fact that she portrays her husband to be such an ass when she’s the one stepping out. Secrets are secrets only up until you start blabbing them to people on one side and denying it on the other.
Exactly. Hypocrites.
That has always been my problem with them all along.
The affair is just icing on my “I Was Right” cake that I’m eatin’ over here! Yummmm….
That is a good point, not one person, even their supporters have said, “this is not true”.
notcoolenough – Not one person. I’d go so far to say that I think at least one of them was hoping this would blow open.
I was wondering that myself. I can see where Adam would be all happy and proud…if she’d just leave her husband and all that.
I, however, do not believe that she would…er…go to Adam if her poor husband did get a clue. No, I think she would just keep him as her trained gorilla for her amusement while he slobbers in lust at her heels.
Unless money was involved…in that case, I daresay she’d fuck him in the middle of Cinderella’s Castle with a magnum of vodka in one hand and a cigarette in the other.
You mean, she doesn’t? We don’t know the HOLE story, of course.
And I think money WAS involved – how’d he lure her half way across the country?
.-= annie´s last blog ..I’m a Twit =-.
Annie – Maybe the question should be “what was she running from in that small town in Iowa?”
Now that was bad of me, wasn’t it?
Donna – Bad only in that you know he doesn’t have any money of his own.
This from the guy who hated people being anonymous on the net because it was deceitful? This from the guys who posts people’s person information on the net…
Wow.
&
Ewwww
I’m sorry but I wouldn’t fuck that fat, hairy pig for all the money in the world. Britt fucked him even before he lost some of the weight and he was still Shamu jr. then. Have you no standards woman.
BTW I think she should refund the money for the motorcycle. She was dishonest about it’s true intent. it was a buy off, period.
Ami – Why do you think he was inspired to get the lap band?
Okay, totally speaking out in defense of big, hairy fat men?
Throttle away if you will…but I always found Adam to be attractive. Yes, yes. He’s my type. I know. Flog away. LOL
But two things would have stopped me from pursuing that:
One, my own big, hairy husband who I worship more than life itself. And two? I know Adam’s wife. I like Adam’s wife a LOT. She’s smart, funny, articulate, sexy, interesting and an all around really good human being.
In short, not Adam’s type at all.
.-= CP´s last blog ..About the Drama…last words on the subject. =-.
CP- you HAVE seen my husband, haven’t you? I bet he’s bigger & hairier than YOURS! Neener.
.-= annie´s last blog ..I’m a Twit =-.
I don’t rhink there is anything wrong with your taste in men.
CP,
Adam is getting divorced. So if you’re single you can hit him up. Sorry but he does nothing for me. Wait yes he does, he makes me scratch my eyes out.
Oh no no, my friend. This Princess is VERY happily married for 8 years to a man who would never even dream of cheating on me, hurting me or making a mockery of my marriage. Adam may be physically appealing to me…but I prefer my men honest, loyal and faithful.
And my Israeli babe is FAR hotter than Adam. Apples and oranges.
But thanks for the kind offer. LOL
.-= CP´s last blog ..The Needy vs. The Greedy =-.
Besides…I’m too fat for Adam. LOL He likes tiny chicks. I don’t qualify. My husband is a chubby chaser.
.-= CP´s last blog ..The Needy vs. The Greedy =-.
I will be the first to admit I don’t have a dog in this hunt but I am nothing if not morbidly curious. What is the timeline? I remember there was some bru ha ha at BlogHer last year, maybe in Adam’s ROYO, because someone said they were having an affair? Or asked? Really I just remember the self righteous indignation after the fact so again, just curious.
And are you honestly and seriously telling me that Jared knows, is aware of this and is 100% okay with his (Adam) staying so entrenched in their lives? Look I know, I know every marriage is different etc etc but having gone through infidelity and the subsequent counseling, I cannot fathom a therapist worth their license endorsing this choice. But again, that’s just me looking in from the outside.
.-= charmingbitch´s last blog ..I Think I Could Take On Chuck Norris =-.
I certainly dont know the exact date they did the deed. I will say that when I met them in january of 09 if it hadn’t happened already, it was about to.
I don’t think Jared has been given a choice. He’s repeatedly forced into playing nice because she won’t choose between them.
Does Jared know?
If he does he is either a fucking saint or the biggest douche who ever walked the planet.
Oh, Jared wouldn’t be walking – he’ll be riding his new fucking motorcycle
(which I assume Britt and Adam actually bought by making the “donations”)
.-= annie´s last blog ..I’m a Twit =-.
Jared absolutely knows. And I am beginning to think he’s just a doormat.
Jared does know and according to Britt, he is “fine” with the situation and having Adam around.
Amy, Adam’s ex-wife, has somehow managed to stay blissfully ignorant. I hope it stays that way. She should never know that the woman she thought of as a friend (Britt) was sleeping with her husband.
Amy is a great lady. She doesn’t deserve this by any stretch. Not referring to the divorce, but rather, to have been made a fool of by the two of them behind her back.
Nobody deserves that when you think that person is your friend.
.-= CP´s last blog ..The Needy vs. The Greedy =-.
WOW. I just cannot even imagine, from either side. I can’t imagine putting my husband in that position (so to speak) or making the decision to stay entrenched when the relationship has already wrecked your own marriage.
It’s trite as hell but my dad always told me that people who put you in bad situations or expect you to do things detrimental to your well being ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS. I know next to nothing about any of these people but I hope Amy got out with at least her dignity and a few good friends. What a mess.
.-= charmingbitch´s last blog ..I Think I Could Take On Chuck Norris =-.
To my knowledge, Amy does not know.
Well, at least she didn’t a week ago.
Who knows how far this post has traveled.
She must have netflix projecting xxx porn out of her vagina or something because there’s doormat and then there’s fool.
They must need the money pretty badly because I simply cannot fathom why any man would allow his wife to stay in close contact with her lover…ex or not.
As to Amy, I really hope someone tells her. Divorce on the grounds of infidelity would pretty much net her everything. Of whatever he has left, that is.
Oh, you mean she was smart enough to leave him without even knowing about the affair? Yeah, she needs to know so she’s not paying HIM alimony or something.
.-= annie´s last blog ..I’m a Twit =-.
“She must have netflix projecting xxx porn out of her vagina or something because there’s doormat and then there’s fool.”
Fucking Donna…LMAO You made me spit out my drink all over my monitor. You always did have a way with words.
.-= CP´s last blog ..The Needy vs. The Greedy =-.
I would think that if Adam is not divorced yet neither he nor she will be commenting on any of it. It would be ammunition for Amy.
He has said in past comments that he would email answer anyone who wanted to know why his marriage broke up. I am guessing pining for another man’s wife would not be the reply.
No. His reply is/was he was simply “not happy”. I would imagine it would be very difficult to be happy with your wife when you are obviously in love with another woman. And yes, I do believe Adam is in love with Britt. All you have to do is read his posts in the past year. It’s irrefutable.
Is it too much for me to wish that Jared and Amy ride off into the sunset with one another? Two really good people who deserve happiness should be together.
.-= CP´s last blog ..The Needy vs. The Greedy =-.
CP-
The past year? Shit Adam was in love with Britt from the first time she posted her pics on the internet, and then made her a job offer. This was his intention ALL ALONG. Pretty sick, how many years is that? I forget.
.-= annie´s last blog ..I’m a Twit =-.
Circa 2006 if memory serves…which it doesn’t, because I’m fucking old.
.-= CP´s last blog ..Her heart in my hands…and I got nothin’. =-.
Long time reader first time commenter…
Thank you.
It’s about fucking time someone said all this.
.-= bubblewench´s last blog ..Hello world! =-.