So last week we said goodbye to Scott.

It was time. He couldn’t keep delivering that Lite FM sound week after week and expect to stick around. Just like Lil better stop trying to bring us to Jesus every week with some gospel-fied version of a song I love. (Little did I know that line would become prophetic….)

I think you will all note that my ranking was pretty spot on last week. Not to blow my own horn or anything…

Tonight’s theme is “music from the movies” under the guidance of Quentin Tarantino.

Wait. What? When did Quentin Tarantino ever sing a note in his life? I get that music plays a big part of his movies, but really? Couldn’t spring for Kenny Loggins or something? I don’t care that he judged back in Season 3… I didn’t think it was a good idea then, either.

Allison Iraheta picked “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” by Aerosmith from the Armageddon soundtrack. The verse is far too low for her and it comes off as far too breathy and weak. The judges of course will think it’s sweet and emotional. They are so desperate to keep a girl in the competition that they are going to talk her up as much as possible. The melody is all over the place, she’s out of breath, and it was really a mess. I’m a huge fan of the original song, and this was just a boring crappy karaoke version. Paula called her “remarkable and talented.” Simon called her the “girl’s only hope” in the competition and thought she sang the song well.

The new format is that only two judges are allowed to speak to avoid running over time.

Anoop Desai is going to inflict upon us “Everything I Do” by Bryan Adams from the “Robin Hood Price of Thieves” soundtrack. I hate this song so much I expect blood to cascade from my ears at any moment. It’s just so over done, schlocky, syrupy and contrived. Just like Anoop singing it tonight. From the gestures and the googlyeyes to the boring delivery it did nothing for me whatsoever. Sure, he’s got a pleasant enough voice, but I could walk onto any college campus and find 100 guys hotter than Anoop who could sing the song just as well. I just keep saying, “So What?” Randy rambled on and on about something, but ended with “I thought you did a really good job.” Kara thought it was one of his best vocals. She felt connected to him.

Adam Lambert picked “Born to Be Wild” by Steppenwolf from “Easy Rider.” Well… it’s Steppenwolf as filtered through a gay dance club. Look, I’m generally a fan of Adam and I truly enjoy that he takes familiar songs and twists them into something else… much like Blake Lewis did a couple of seasons ago. Most of the time that formula works. Tonight, I can’t say that it really did. The song came across as “frantic” and frankly, hard to listen to. Of course he was on pitch, and he’s got that rock star voice down cold, but this particular arrangement was not my favorite at all. I don’t think he’s going home; he is still unquestionably the most artistic performer left in the competition. Paula couldn’t even speak for a bit for all the screaming in the audience. She said, “you dare to dance in the path of greatness.” Uh. WHAT? Then, “Fortune rewards the brave and you are one of the bravest contestants I have ever witnessed.” Simon said, “I think you need to find a way to express yourself more.” He thought the vocals were brilliant, but it reminded him a bit of “Rocky Horror Picture Show.”

Matt Giraud is now going to impale my senses with “Have You Really Ever Loved A Woman” by Bryan Adams from “Don Juan DeMarco.” You would think by my saying that twice that I’m not a fan of Bryan Adams… you would be wrong. I actually really like him. I just happen to despise the two big Bryan Adams songs performed tonight. I can name a dozen songs by him that I really love. And two that make me wish I could go back in time and force him to lose his voice during the recording sessions so some artist I don’t like could perform the song instead. Perhaps the songs would have worked as Bruce Springsteen records. I wouldn’t care then. Annnnnnnnnyway, let’s get back to the show, shall we? He’s back at the piano which is usually a big plus for him. The beginning of the song was great. I thought for a minute he was really switching the song up and I might actually care. Then the band came in with that monotonous lilting 3/4 rhythm that makes this song insufferable. AND! He’s having a lot of trouble staying in the key. For a full line of the song I don’t think he was anywhere close. I’m worried about Matt, who I’ve mentioned is the guy that I’m secretly (not so secretly?) hoping will pull ahead and win this thing. I think he’s in a lot of trouble tonight. Randy thought it started out really cool, but the bridge went weird. He didn’t think it was one of his best. Kara didn’t like the melody changes and thought he tried to do too much with it.

Danny Gokey is next with “Endless Love” by Lionel Richie from the movie of the same name. The song is beautiful, the arrangement was lovely. Danny’s vocals were consistently good. He didn’t do too much to change the song’s melody, but added a different intensity level that doesn’t exist in the original. I struggle to find things to say every week because he’s so consistently good. This *could* be a bad thing, though… the radio is full of middle of the road performers that have a brief moment in the spotlight before being dropped by their label and disappearing. I watch this show in part to find the artist that I think has the best chance at becoming a superstar. American Idol has already had a couple, the biggest being Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson. I can’t see Danny reaching that same level of success if he’s just “consistently good” every week. I would really like to see him take a chance and step a bit outside his comfort level and nail something unexpected. Paula thought it was a beautiful rendition. Simon said, “I can’t fault the way you sing the song.” He said he was “disappointed that the song was done so safely.” He then congratulated him for performing a song that so obviously holds a deep emotional meaning for him.

Kris Allen takes the stage with “Falling Slowly” by Glen Hansard and Mark�ta Irglov� from the movie “Once.” He’s got a really nice lower register that I don’t remember hearing before. This came very close to bringing a tear to my eye. It was soft and tender and showed Kris’s range off nicely. The harmony vocalist blended with Kris perfectly. The final phrase gave me a slight chill, which is a great thing! The only danger here in my mind is that the song isn’t really that well known. But, I’m guessing it will be better known after tonight. My pick for top performance tonight thus far. Randy didn’t get it. He thought it was pitchy from note one. Kara said it was one of Kris’s best moments. Ever.

Lil Rounds picked Bette Midler’s “The Rose” from the movie “The Rose.” This song has always been up there on my list of favorite songs. It’s one of the first songs I learned to play on the piano as a kid. In high school, our show choir performed an arrangement of it that had these alto harmony parts that would raise the hair on the back of my neck every time was sang it. I can already tell I’m going to hate this. She described it as having a “gospel middle.” *sigh* hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate
hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate
hatehatehatehatehatehatehate it. First, the pitch was so bad in places that I thought for a minute she forgot the song. Then she would land on a note and start to do her gymnastics with vibrato and runs and would get so far sharp that she was almost singing a half-step off. The gospel-izing of the song was a ridiculous attempt at garnering the vote of those audience members who think that screeching in your face vocal style is the be-all end-all of music. Lil has turned into one of the biggest disappointments of any contestant over the past 8 seasons. She started out as one of my early favorites and now I can’t wait for her to go away. Far. Far. Far. Away. Perhaps someplace where the murder of a perfectly good song is not illegal. Paula loved the lyrics (?). Simon thought she got it completely wrong. He said he’s frustrated by her inability to really come into her own as an artist.

This week was pretty much dead in the water. Overall, it was crap. Totally useless crap.

Here’s my rankings:

1. Kris Allen
2. Danny Gokey
3. Adam Lambert
4. Anoop Desai
5. Matt Giraud
6. Allison Iraheta
7. Lil Rounds

So am I totally off base, or did this week suck the joy out of life?