They don’t sound much like friends, so maybe you’ve got it backwards… maybe THEY’RE complete assholes that no one really SHOULD like.

Dave2s last blog post..Bullet Sunday 96

i like you. bunches and bunches.

hello haha narfs last blog post..It Is Labor Day and I Ain’t Working

i totally relate to this. last year nearly every single one of my friendships imploded, and this because i just wouldn’t suffer shenanigans anymore. i felt like i was making all the concessions, giving all the time, and the more i gave or the more i cared, the more they let me, giving fractional amounts in return. once they imploded, however, and i cleared them away, it was amazing how many new relationships entered my life. i think when we get rid of people who “don’t fit”, we make room for people of real quality to populate our lives. the more we accept this generally, the easier it is to flow in and out of these relationships.

anyway, this is what i’ve learned. sorry your “friends” are lame.

Cryss last blog post..How To Be A Saint

Well, you are an asshole, but that’s why people become your friend, so it can’t be that reason.

I think that world just has a lot of bad friends - people who don’t value friendship enough to maintain it. It’s unfortunate, and you have to decide if it’s worth it for you to be the one to keep in touch, or if you want to wait for the contact that might never happen.

Avitables last blog post..You lazy fuckers should be at work.

Dude, I’m so over you. I’m always, like, coming over to YOUR blog and commenting, reaching out, but you never initiate anything over on my side.

I always listen to YOUR radio show, but when have you ever listened to MY radio show? If you try bringing up that I don’t have a radio show, that would just be a desperate excuse on your part. A real friend would find a way.

Dude, you were right to put friend in quotes. I went through that the first two years I was in Denver and keep purging them from my life until I find some true friends over years 3 & 4 who are still my best friends here.

Howards last blog post..Tomorrow Is The Big Day

I don’t think it’s you when you are the one always initiating the contact. I’ve been through this before where I just let go of the friendships I felt like I was keeping alive. It hurt at first to feel like no one seem to care. What I’ve recently found out is that things go full circle and I’ve had some of those people come back into my life after being gone years and years. Some by my own initiation, some by theirs.

I wouldn’t take on all the blame. That’s not going to do anything productive for you. Take a look at the people who are currently in your life. Let go of those who have faded away.

Thank you for this post. I absolutely recognize myself in it, and sadly, it’s because I tend to be like your “friends.” I’m TERRIBLE about doing the maintenance things in a friendship, not because I don’t care, but because I tend to “live in the moment” and focus what’s happening in my life at that exact point in time. Thanks for showing me how my friends probably feel. I MUST work on this.

SJs last blog post..In praise of memes

I’ve been guilty of this in the past, too. But like SJ said, it was never because I didn’t care. Sometimes things just get away from you.

It sucks and you have every right to call them on it.

Finns last blog post..Reader’s Choice: Bad Moon

I know exactly how you feel.

My best friend is getting married in a year and I’m supposedly in her wedding party. But she hasn’t even called me to tell me she’s in engaged yet. It’s been several months.

Sigh.

Sarahs last blog post..Feel the Teal

Maybe since you’re now a blog diva, they don’t feel worthy.

I’ve heard that there’s a crime ring that is going around chopping off the dialing fingers of average people. But still, they could dial with a chopstick in their mouths. You’re fine - they suck - end of story.

I completely feel you on this. I’ve had what I thought was a best friend until I mentioned to her the fact that I’m always the one initiating conversation with her. She informed me that she was just so busy, but that we were still close.

So I’ve stopped calling her. Needless to say, we don’t talk much anymore.

Dave2 - Maybe. I really think that I hold them higher on the “Friendship Scale” than they hold me.

hello - and I like you bunches and bunches, too!

Crys - Yeah, I have experienced this a few times in my life where I basically traded everyone in for newer models. It may be time to do that again.

Avitable - Yeah, people love me for being an asshole. What was I thinking?

Whall - I talk to you on Twitter. I rarely comment on other blogs. I’m a bad person. But I promise if you were to call or email me, you’d get a response!

Howard - It’s too bad you live in Denver!

Lisa - It still feels like if I don’t continue making the effort than the end of the friendship is all my fault. I should have been born Jewish, I got the guilt gene.

SJ - It’s really not hard to maintain a friendship with me. I don’t require daily chats or phone calls. Just checking in occasionally works fine. An occasional “Hi, what’s up?” is fine. Your friends are probably the same way. Just a five minute phone call!

Finn - I know shit happens and things get in the way. I get that. But when it’s a recurring pattern, it’s more than just temporary bullshit. It comes across as a total lack of respect.

Sarah - Perhaps you should have other plans on her wedding day…?

Steve - I’m a blog diva? Since when?

Chris - I don’t think a chopstick will work with an iPhone.

Margaret - Yeah, if she’s that busy I guess she doesn’t need friends?

Meh. I know people like that. They aren’t really my friends anymore, although they may h ave been at one time. On another note, you’ll have to email me your phone number so I CAN call you… and bug the crap outta ya!

Winters last blog post..Menage a Meh

I have lost friends, some by death… others through sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf

seems appropriate to the post. sad that even with all of the technological advances and the million and five ways to get ahold of people we still slack off.

heathers last blog post..monday morning music with a mission

i still love you! haven’t talked to you in ages but still consider you one of the best friends i’ve ever had. wish you still lived in nashville.

Winter - You can have my number if you promise to share it with all those fucking hot guys you know.

heather - I love that quote. And, yeah.. to hell with people who can’t drop me a damn email!

Jesi - Love you too. And I often wish I still lived in Nashville. We’ll visit sometime soon.

I’ve had a couple close friends that I would never hear from unless I bothered to pursue them. If I didn’t initiate conversation or propose times to hang out, we just didn’t speak. It gave me such a freaken complex! I walked around asking myself, “Am I too needy?” It never occurred to me that my friends just suck.

I’m just crappy about keeping in touch. truly. But I know it and am trying to fix it.

ginamonsters last blog post..There goes Mr Finnigan; begin again.

I don’t know about this. I have lots of old friends. Almost all of us have grown apart, scattered across the country (or countries) married, had kids, settled into careers, relationships, and well, life. They are all still my friends though. We may not be 16 staying up all night on the phone talking about BS anymore, but it’s great to hear from them occasionally.

I find myself calling them to catch up when that life is interrupted. Like when I’m sitting at an airport on a 2 hour layover, or I have a random but rare day off of work. I don’t think to call when I’m doing my now daily routine of work, rush home, take out the dogs, pick up my daughter from daycare, check the web, eat dinner, put daughter to bath/brush teeth/pajamas/story/bed, unwind, sleep, repeat. It never helps that almost all of my friends are 3 to 6 time zones ahead of me, either.

Honestly though, there are those who really need that feedback of ongoing friendship, and others who can accept it exists even after long periods without contact. I think I fall somewhere in between. Neither is worse, it is simply who we are. It doesn’t make friends any less of friends just because they grow up and shift their priorities, either. Old friends, new friends. They are all great.

Conversely, maybe they don’t bother calling because they are avid lurkers!

rebturtles last blog post..Simple pleasures