The One Where Jester Becomes THAT Asshole

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[UPDATED 7/25/08: Please see the new post describing the aftermath, apologies, and reconciliation before you launch a new attack on either me or Lisa.]

Seriously, you all just might want to unsub from this blog right now. Just walk away shaking your head and saying I can’t BELIEVE that guy…

Still here?

Ok then, you fucking asked for it.

My post about Annoyances yesterday was, for the most part, taken for exactly what it was… a tongue-in-cheek diatribe describing the bitter mood I’ve found myself in for the past few days. Most of you understood that not only was I poking fun at a lot of you, but I was also mostly poking fun at myself. MOST of you played along in comments and reminded me how much fun my blog can actually be.

But then there is that ONE person who seems to think she was unfairly called out. Or was being targeted in some smear campaign.

Lisa from Clusterfook seems to think that she is the only person I could have possibly been talking about who writes about needing money. Or who might have other people asking to donate money on her behalf.

At least that’s what I *think* she is upset about. I’m not sure, because she’s not real clear in her comments whether she’s upset about the money thing or the Anti-BlogHer thing.

Oh, but we CAN look in our handy little feed readers and find out what her real problem is… Shall we do that?

And before one any of you scream at me to take this to email, let me just say this: The post went out to everyone who gets her feed. I’d link to the post and leave a comment there responding to her, but the post was pulled making that impossible. I also know that the Cunt Coven and all their harpies will be streaming out of the woodwork to call for my public beheading whether I address the issue or not.

Here’s what the post said:

I’ve about had it with this guy having problems with the kindness of others helping my family and I’m done. This is the second time he’s had something to say about how it “annoys” him that other bloggers would help out a blogger who has cancer.

I’m sick of this two-faced ass acting like he cares then stabbing me in the back. He makes me sick. He stressed me out beyond belief in April and now he dares to do it again.

How fortunate for you that you are healthy. How fortunate that you have a job. I once had all of those things but you know what? Life changed. I got cancer…three fucking times in four years. I got laid off from my job…four days before I started chemo. I was denied Unemployment.

Think it’s a sob story? I don’t do sob stories…I do the truth. Be a man for once and have the balls to come to me first and tell me you have a problem instead of being a pussy by hiding on your blog.

I’m done with this crap. I’ve had it.

Let’s take a look at this a bit closer, shall we? First, here’s what I ACTUALLY said in my post yesterday that Lisa seems to have an issue with:

Things that are annoying Jester about the Blog-o-sphere lately: # Pro-BlogHer posts # Anti-BlogHer posts [...] # Posts that thinly veil a beg for money # Posts that overtly direct you to give money to those thinly veiling their begs for money [...]

Now back to Lisa’s post:

[...] having problems with the kindness of others helping my family and I’m done. This is the second time he’s had something to say about how it “annoys” him that other bloggers would help out a blogger who has cancer.

Would someone please point out to me where I’ve said anything at all about having a problem with the kindness of others? Where did I say anything about being annoyed by people helping out someone with cancer? I’ve run a find “cancer” on that post a dozen times and funny, nothing comes up. Lisa says that this is the SECOND time that I’ve said this. Certainly she is referring to my Call to Action post from back in April, where I dared say that I didn’t trust the person organizing the drive to raise money for Lisa’s trip to DisneyWorld. That post CERTAINLY doesn’t say anything negative about actually helping Lisa, in fact, it says just the opposite. It calls people to contact their employers and other companies that could help provide needed supplies for her and her family. Man, I’m such an asshole!

I’m sick of this two-faced ass acting like he cares then stabbing me in the back. He makes me sick. He stressed me out beyond belief in April and now he dares to do it again.

Where exactly did I stab Lisa in the back? At what point did I do something that was “two-faced?” I can be accused of many things, but being two-faced is not one of them. The emails and chats that I exchanged with Lisa back when the Call to Action clusterfuck was going on indicated to me that she wasn’t “stressed” or even upset with me. She certainly wasn’t “crying her eyes out” as the commentors claimed. She merely said that she “wished there wasn’t so much drama surrounding this, but I know not everyone gets along.”

How fortunate for you that you are healthy. How fortunate that you have a job. I once had all of those things but you know what? Life changed. I got cancer…three fucking times in four years. I got laid off from my job…four days before I started chemo. I was denied Unemployment.

Healthy? Me? I have CFS, a disease no one really believes exists or for which a set course of treatment exists. I’m overweight, pre-diabetic, my liver is doing some funky shit, my blood pressure is off the charts, and every single cold or flu bug that comes along knocks me on my ass for 2 weeks at a minimum. I finally have a steady job again after being mostly out of work for the better part of a year. My house is going into foreclosure and I don’t see any way out of it. But Lisa’s right, I’m not dying at the same rate of speed she is.

My point is that we all have some fucked up shit in our lives. It sucks that Lisa got cancer. Again. It sucks that the system is totally letting her down. It sucks that she has all this pent up anger inside that she feels she has to throw in my direction. It sucks that there isn’t a bloody thing that any one of us can do to stop this sickness.

Think it’s a sob story? I don’t do sob stories…I do the truth. Be a man for once and have the balls to come to me first and tell me you have a problem instead of being a pussy by hiding on your blog.

Now see, here we go… IF I had a problem with Lisa I would have certainly gone to her directly. I have absolutely NO problem going to the source. I was recently quite perturbed at Miss Britt over something I’m sure I was blowing out of proportion. She got an email from me that told her I was upset and why and everything blew over.

Calling me a pussy on her blog and then pulling the post so that I can’t respond? That’s just delicious irony there.

________________

This part of this post is directed to Lisa head on and posted here so there is no misquoting and faked emails going around about what I did or did not say because I know how certain people on the polluted side of the blog pond operate.

I really am sorry that you are taking something personally that you shouldn’t be. I know that your entire world must be completely consumed by your situation. I know that reading things through that particular lens must be a tough thing to do. But it’s really rather silly of you to go off all righteous when you have no idea what the hell you’re talking about. Yours is not the only blog I read. Yours is not the only tragic tale being told. You’re not even the only person I read who has cancer.

Your blog also doesn’t “thinly veil” your fund raising campaign. It’s pretty blatant.

There is an entire universe of things happening outside your doorstep, outside of your blog, and outside of your cancer that will continue to happen long after you or I or anyone reading this are dead and gone. That’s a pretty easy thing to intellectualize, but incredibly difficult to actually realize.

I have been in the position of watching people die around me more than most people. I have lost friends suddenly to suicide and slowly from AIDS. I’ve had family members linger with painful cancers and emphysema. I’ve spent countless hours in hospitals and nursing homes caring for patients who are barely conscious or lucid. I’ve also scooped up the results of devastating car accidents into tiny bags.

I’ve come away from the sum of these experiences with a fundamental truth about life:

You should count yourself lucky that you know your death is imminent. You have the opportunity to say all the things that you want to say to everyone in your life that is important to you. You have the opportunity to write letters to your children, make videos for them to watch on days when they miss their mother. You can put your affairs in order and make your wishes about your funeral and your remains known.

Anyone of us could step off a curb and get creamed by a bus ten minutes after stepping outside. What would we have left undone? Would I have called my parents to thank them for everything they have ever done for me? Would UMB know what he means to me, or what to do with all my things? Would I have the opportunity to leave something lasting for the world to remember me by? Would the people who have enriched my life via this blog know how much of a rock they have become to me?

Not if I stepped off that curb into the path of a bus tomorrow.

You? You have the answer to the question that every single religion in existence was created to solve.
You have the answer to the question that plagues every single human being on the planet: “When and How will I die? How much time do I have?”

The answer is not very fucking much. And you’re spending that time fretting about medical bills and collection agents and the perceived slights against you on a stranger’s blog? You are expending your energies writing missives about my being a two-faced ass, and blaming me for the actions of others who don’t believe you are even sick?

Get yourself set up with a bankruptcy attorney who can help bail your family out of the overwhelming debt the medical bills are creating. That’s why bankruptcy laws were created, to help those who suffer a devastating event. Your illness certainly qualifies.

Spend the remaining time you have left focusing on things that matter… your family, your friends, and your spiritual needs.

Everything else, me included? A barely visible blip on the radar. Nothing more than a little noise.

I wish you peace, laughter, and all the love you can squeeze into the months ahead.

-Paul
aka Jester

118 thoughts on “The One Where Jester Becomes THAT Asshole”

  3. Sodapop – Where is the explanation from Lisa that says she pulled the post because she knew it was posted in anger? I certainly didn’t get that. What I got was a public dressing down on Twitter last night, hardly a “one on one” confrontation. And I didn’t really compare my health issues with her terminal cancer, she said that I’m healthy and I simply refuted that. CFS is not curable. Luckily, it’s not terminal. But again, having a terminal illness does not absolve you of responsibility for waging an unprovoked or misguided attack on someone else.

    Othurme – The devil must have planted that twitter log. That’s the only rational explanation.

  4. Anyone who would like to take this conversation privately to one on one twitter, let me know….I only have 3500 people following me. If that’s not private, I don’t know what is.

    othurmes last blog post..Kick Down Some Buckets

  5. Jester,

    clusterfook @karlerikson because I posted it out of anger and realized I shouldn’t have done it, now I can’t sleep (posted 14 hours ago)

    I can do a screen shot and email you the thing if you’d like. Or you can just click on Lisa’s icon on Twitter and read back to see it yourself. :)

    And like I said, I DID see the Twitter conversation. I was awake at 3:30 in the morning during it.

    Sodapops last blog post..What a crazy day.

  6. Jester, You’re not even worth it to get pissed about. You’re pathetic. I already know what an asshole you are from Lisa’s Raffle debacle and having to turn the attention all to yourself. So, no surprise here. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if you were “anon”, but anyway, you agree so strongly with him!
    I’m just glad to see you showing your ass to a few more people!

    Why don’t you go out and kick children and shove down the people using the handicapped parking spaces, because OMG! They aren’t in a wheelchair! What are they whining about?

    Oh, and I’m happy to give you “bus” fare.

    annies last blog post..Calling All Bloggers

  7. Ok, for those of you that are new to this blog, welcome to the circus. This blog is not for the shy, the easily offended, or the serious. I have known Jester for a very long time. Other than his relatives, I’ve probably known him longer than anyone else (not to say that I know him any better than you). I’m going to get straight to the point. No one can say how they would react to a diagnosis of a terminal illness. I have been in the medical field for 10+ years and have seen every reaction imaginable other than immediate suicide. However, I have a personal story that I have shared on this blog about my own diagnosis. If you go back far enough, you’ll find it. In this guest post, you’ll find many things out about me that didn’t “have to be” shared. Jester even questioned rather he should actually post the story. I told him that I wanted to share my story with others. He, against his own judgement, granted my wish. As someone with an illness myself, I routinely say…”We are all terminal, just some know it and some don’t.” Personally, I find myself pretty blessed to know that my body is not going to survive it’s intended length. Within that same breath, I know that not everyone can feel this way. I think Jester was trying to offer support in the best way he knew how…giving alternative options.

    Jester would never intend to kick someone while they are down. If Lisa is truly ill (and we all hope she’s well), then she is going through a time in her life right now that she WILL need all the help and support she can beg for. I did it. There’s actually a complete website I found that allows those that claim to be ill to tell their story and ask for money. There’s no other reason to be on the site other than to ask for money or to give money. It was never fruitfull, but definately worth the shot for someone who truly needs it. Although filling bankruptcy sounds like the answer Jester, it’s not that easy. The best way to do that would be to have the bankruptcy finalized the day you die (signing the papers with the judge present at the foot of your deathbed) and have a specific clause to include the medical/doctor/hospital bills you may accumulate for that day. Nearly impossible if not so.

    If you’ve never been to this blog, than please read some of the other posts before commenting solely on this one. You will find that most (although not all) people have taken this situation out of its intentions and turned it into a place to leave hate mail. This is a great blog and I will always feel free to speak my mind here. That’s what Jester intended it for and asks for. He may not agree with your comments or you with his, but he will respect your opinions and thoughts, so long as they are not a direct insult to his being.

    Lisa, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I feel your pain and wish you only the best (rather you’re sick or not). Jester, I appologize for taking up so much space and hope you don’t find this to be too annoying.

  10. Othurme, I never said she took it private. I’d like to see where I said that. Other than that, I’m done with this conversation.

    I am not calling Jester names. I am not picking sides. I was pointing out some discrepancies that I saw, that is all.

    I’m allowed to do that here, aren’t? I would expect nothing less from Jester or the readers of this blog to let me have my opinions even if they disagree.

    Sodapops last blog post..What a crazy day.

  11. “Lisa pulled her post because she knew she posted it in anger. And then confronted you one on one, rather than leaving a post here for the world to see and opine about. The same respect could have been shown.”

    Sodapop makes a couple points I’m now left to ponder…which are…how one-on-one in front of 10,000 followers is somehow better than a blog post?

    And how the term one-on-one can somehow involve a third party tweeter.

    othurmes last blog post..Kick Down Some Buckets

  12. othurme – You forget that tweets also go on the public timeline where they can be seen by every single person on the internet.

    Sodapop – That comment to Karl was made BEFORE she dressed me down on twitter. She never offered an explanation to me or even seemed embarrassed or otherwise apologetic for flying off the handle and accusing me of being a two-faced ass.

    Annie – Oh heavens to betsy the right hand of the coven has arrived to shockingly tell me that she doesn’t like me. I suspect there will be a rash of blog posts on that side of the sewer that misquote me, misrepresent what I’ve said, and otherwise stir the cauldron. You’re boring and predictable.

    Toby – You can come here and leave your annoying comments anytime you want. Love ya!

    Sodapop – Of course you’re welcome to have a differing opinion. I think Othurme (and myself) would like to know what the difference is between the very public twitter bombing I received last night and the subsequent blog post. I don’t see them as different, nor do I see any admission from Lisa that it’s even POSSIBLE that she overreacted or otherwise lashed out at me for no real reason.

  13. Perception is reality. If she does not FEEL she owes you an apology, then I would not expect one from her.

    Whether she overreacted or not is going to be up to her to admit. If she doesn’t feel she did, then I don’t see why she should be forced to apologize for something she felt she was in the “right” on.

    Just my two cents on that.

    As for the whole Twitter/one on one debate, we are obviously going to disagree, so I suggest we agree to disagree and move on. :D

    Sodapops last blog post..I went Rocky Mountain climbing…

  15. I demand that Jester be strung up by his balls in the center square of the PRB. Once there the cunt coven will poke him with knitting needles while chanting spells to banish his soul to the deepest fires of hell. The rest of us will laugh to see such a sight…

    *NOW* do I get some damn jelly? I mean really what does it take around here?

    Chriss last blog post..Step away from the cupcakes and no one gets hurt!

  18. Jester, I happen to agree with you. I was checking out her blog, and immediately came over here to see your previous post. When I read your previous post, it did not make any mention of any particular person. In fact, my posts were listed as being frustrating to you, but I didn’t freak out and get upset.

    There are a number of people that request donations on their site, either for themselves or causes. I don’t understand why she took it personally and why she thinks it’s specifically about HER. Did it occur to her that you were also taking fun jabs at others, and that the post is not all about her?

    I am not going to tread lightly here just because she is in a delicate condition. I have noticed extreme personalization of things by her lately, and many others (which you call the cunt coven).

    I will forever remain loyal to you, even if my mental illness drives you nuts. :-)

    Notice I didn’t go manic on you when you mentioned mental illness; but she went all apeshit and personalized your statement about asking for donations. What’s the fucking difference? I could have personalized your statement just as much as her, but I didn’t.

    Absurdists last blog post..Who Do You Tip?

  19. I am just going to follow Hilly around the Internet today and say “what she said”.

    And also? My recent love fest over Soda is growing by the day.

  20. jester, I don’t know you. This is the first time I ever read your blog. I read Lisa’s regularly. I rarely comment on any blog. You don’t seem to have the frame of reference necessary to interact compassionately with someone dying of cancer. In plain english you don’t get it. Maybe you want to, maybe you could but you don’t. Until you walk a mile in someone’s shoes who is dying, not might be or possibly in the future, but in the here and now you don’t get it. My wife died six weeks ago after a three year battle with colon cancer. I don’t know that I got the pain and suffering she went through and I was there. But by damn , sure as the pope is catholic, the back and forth nonsense you are laying out for her is ridiculous. Every cancer patient I saw was self absorbed and emotionally raw. It is part of coping with the disease. Lighten up, and let her the hell alone. If you don’t like what she has to say ignore her. Stress makes the disease worse. Oh and by the way I have a three year old daughter. And if someone told my wife she was lucky because she could say goodbye to her daughter, I would have punched them in the mouth. You see the only thing she ever wanted was a child to raise. And she didn’t get to do much child rearing, being diagnosed six months after the baby was born.

  21. Sodapop – I don’t expect an apology. If she didn’t feel she overreacted, then there must be some other reason she pulled that post. We’ll have to disagree that Twitter is a one on one forum. I’m guessing the 400 people who follow me will probably back me up on that.

    Othurme – You’re gonna need a database to keep all this straight.

    Chris – You just want to touch my balls.

    Absurdist – You should be afraid, but not for the reasons you might think. And I knew you’d get the point of my post.

    Miss Britt – So perhaps you can explain Soda’s position that twitter isn’t a public forum in a way that makes sense?

  22. Actually no, I can’t. But I don’t think she was saying it wasn’t “public” – but was trying to make the distinction that she addressed you. Whatever. Wasn’t my point.

    The reason I’m impressed with Soda is because she came here, she disagreed with you, but she did it respectfully and intelligently without calling you names or promising to ban you from whatever.

    And not only that, but she did so while giving the impression that she had enough respect for you to assume you’d do the same.

    Surely you can appreciate that.

    Miss Britts last blog post..So… we’re going to talk about abortion

  24. basteine – I am awfully sorry to hear about your loss. I suppose until you’ve been in the position of losing someone suddenly without warning, you’ll have no idea what my frame of reference is. Amazing what perspective does for you. I’ve been in both positions, and I strongly stand behind my statement that she is lucky to know. Did your wife leave things for your daughter to read when she grows up? Did your wife make sure there were plenty of photographs and moments of quiet and love? If that doesn’t make her lucky, I don’t know what would. Thanks for stopping by.

    Miss Britt – Of course I appreciate that. Sodapop and I had conversations back in April when this subject first came up, and she and I continue to be friendly and respect each other. That’s what adults do.

  25. OthurMe, you and I are going to begin a very hot, torrid love affair. At least, in blog terms. And I want some of that jelly pronto!

    Hardly anyone reads my blog, so I am in no danger of losing anything by speaking my mind. I have one here somewhere…

    I think this is very much a live and let live situation. Suffering is so very relative. Cancer sucks. Pain sucks. Die of cancer or live with debilitating pain for decades…honestly? That’s a tough choice. But in the end, only the person in that situation can truly know what they are thinking and feeling.

    However-and this is a butt as big as mine-I agree that Lisa’s time is better spent with her family, instead of getting wrapped up in pointless drama that aggravates her condition. Raw emotions or not, there are more important places for her to expend her energy.

    Hanging Jester up by his balls in the bloggy square to have darts thrown at his boy-bits is really extreme. If you read this blog, you understand his sense of humor, or are at least tolerant of it. If not, you have no business reading his blog. To assume that his list of annoyances referred to Lisa assumes greater importance of her blog than it may actually have. Kind of silly to think it’s the only blog that is looking for donations that he might ever read.

    In fact, there’s this new blog I’ve heard of. It’s called Jester’s Tomatoes and I think it’s raising money to save Jester’s house. Because he needs help too. Shit, we all do.

    So…um…can’t we all just agree to disagree?

    TSMs last blog post..You Are Cordially Invited to a Pity Party

  26. Meh. I am already on 90% of the shit lists out there. I don’t give a rat’s ass what they think of me.

    Avi thinks i am a jew hater, the cunt brigade thinks I have multiple personality disorder, and Shiny still loves me.

    I am kidding a about the Avi thing. But I had to say, just in case. :-)

    Absurdists last blog post..Who Do You Tip?

  27. Britt, thank you, I believe that is what I was trying to say. I did not say it wasn’t public, just that she had confronted him on it. While it’s not the way *I* would have done, it was the way she chose to do it at that time.

    AND thank you for saying those awesome things about me :) I try!

    Jester, I can’t see anything being said that would make me not be friendly when I come here to disagree with you, or anyone for that matter. :)

  29. my what a day you had today!
    can i pay you to piss off my mother in law? maybe then i won’t have to deal with the command performances on a regular basis.
    which is better? waxing or lasering?

    and for the record, i too think that having a time frame for your death is a blessing. a seriously disguised blessing but a blessing all the same. the knowing causes it’s own pain and anxiety but i would think that it would force you to pay more attention to what’s important. apparently money and hate mongering are what’s important to some while others remember to do their best to treasure the little moments and try to prepare their kids for their death.

    heathers last blog post..when it rains

  33. Jester, you are not always right. You need to come to terms with that. Trying to make yourself look like a better person than a woman who is facing the fight for her life, just makes you look like an ass. Stop it. You are hurting her and she doesn’t need that right now. If you really want to take the high ground, drop it.

    And now I’ve gone against one of my own personal rules and that is to try to stay out of all this drama shit. I’ll just go back to my little hole in the blogosphere where almost no one bothers me.

    Shellis last blog post..Fate, Or Whatever You Call It, Steps In

  34. What a crock of shit. Quit acting like you weren’t pointing fingers. You are just as passive-aggressive as the next schmuck who tries to run a “bitter humor” blog. You suck at what you do. Get off your fat ass and go for a walk. Try losing a few pounds. It’s amazing what exercise will do for you. Trimming down a few sizes will take away 90% of your problems. CFS is not curable because it is a psychological disorder. Cancer, not so much.

    Like Lisa said, you started this in April.

  38. TSM – I think you hit the nail on the head: assuming my list of annoyances referred to Lisa imparts too much importance on her blog. I’d go so far to say that it’s entirely possible that if your brain jumped to Lisa automatically, perhaps you were thinking something similar and didn’t say it out loud. It’s a possibility is all I’m saying.

    Absurdist – The shit list is sometimes the place to be.

    Sodapop – Me either.

    Pixie – I wish I had the money for laser treatments. They are incredibly expensive. I don’t have the money.

    heather – I guess we all deal with grief in different ways.

    Chris – I think we can work out something.

    Opprobrius – Um. Thanks?

    Shelli – Thanks for commenting. I think you and I are going to disagree on many things.

    Anonymous – You’re a fucking idiot.

    Othurme – And they taste good with peanut butter.

    Amanda – Yeah if you can’t say what you have to say with a contact email address you should know better than open your mouth.

    Chris – Attack me. I can take it. But pick something less obvious than my weight. Aim for my big nose, I’m self conscious about it.

  39. Thank you for having the courage to post and say outloud what a LOT of people have been saying to themselves. She should be spending her time with her kids, not posting and begging for money. And oh joy, I can’t wait for the idiots to come say, “God help you, I hope you never get cancer,” because I dared to post something. We’re all dying. ALL. My reply to that crap is, god help you, you could get ran over by a bus tomorrow! Thousands of young mothers die each day, for tons of other reasons besides cancer.

    And I know a lot of people who would shave their head on cam for thousands of sympathy bucks, too. Sad but true. Thanks for posting this, Jester. Let’s see how many seconds Lisa actually does the latest drama and stops blogging about begging for cash. I give it till next week.

  40. I think this is all ridiculous. Leave her alone. Just drop it. Stop dragging it on by responding to her responses. She’s got a right to be upset about everything or nothing. It doesn’t have to be right or wrong. Just leave her alone. Be the bigger person, if you want to see it that way.

    by the way, I’m not giving my info specifically because I do not want to get dragged into this.

  41. for what it’s worth, i believe you don’t have bad feelings for Lisa. i also don’t doubt that you wish her well and if you could do something to take this away from her, you would. you’re like the rest of us in that regard.

    where we differ, however, is that i wouldn’t have taken this opportunity to call her out; i’d have let it slide. i’d have also apologized for any perceived insult, whether i’d intended one or not, because i know it would have made her feel better. i’d have wanted that above needing to get my own version of events out, or needing to tell others how i feel or why i may be right.

    sometimes it’s okay to let people be asses (not that she was — i’m speaking generally). sometimes it’s okay to rise above things that bother you and let things slide; take a higher view. i think while essentially what you’re doing could not be labeled “wrong”, i DO think it provided a forum for “anonymous” users (and others with a striking lack of tact) to come here and criticize Lisa at this very difficult time in her life. for that ALONE i would not have done what you’ve done here.

    i wish we could all just stop existing out of our own self-interest for ONE minute, and think about other people and how what we do affects them.

    sigh.

    peace,
    crys

  42. oh man, sorry i didn’t provide a link. i wasn’t trying to be one of the many anonymous who post here.

  43. I love reading this kind of comment: Take the higher ground, just stop commenting, be the bigger person.

    Ummm…HELLO? HI? GUILTY OF YOUR OWN ACCUSATIONS? Anyone? It seems you don’t have the same will power to keep your pie hole closed that you would like the owner of this blog practice.

    And the next time you are accused of shit you didn’t do (seriously bad shit) and then threatened by that person with a gun publicly? I would like to be there to watch you exercise this amazing self control you preach about (and only preach is about).

    Let me know where to send your free jar of Shut The Fuck Up jelly.

  44. “i wish we could all just stop existing out of our own self-interest for ONE minute, and think about other people and how what we do affects them.”

    Crys, FTW.

  46. I guess I fall more under Crys’ viewpoint. Even though we CAN say things and defend ourselves, sometimes it’s best just to let it go. I don’t think anyone would have thought less of Jester had he not retaliated with this second post. Granted, I love the people on both sides of this squabble.

  47. I´m not taking sides. Its not my place to intervene, as this is a matter that is between you and Lisa – but all I see is that posts such as this are causing further unnecessary stress to a person who is dying. Stress depletes the immune system.

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  49. jester I have been on both sides of that fence. Neither is easier than the other. They both suck just differently. No my wife did not leave much. At least not much that was organized in the way of pictures, stories and journals. She blogged for a few months, but my daughter doesn’t need to see that until she is much older. There are lots of pictures. My wife was too overcome with emotion and unable to deal with losing her daughter while preparing herself to die. She never got over the fact she was not going to watch her child grow up. Every time we discussed ” legacies or mementoes” she ended up sobbing. So time to prepare was emotional hell not relief. Everybody has different perspectives, perhaps I was hasty to call you out on yours. But I don’t think you understand my wife’s. As far as Lisa ASKING for money, from personal experience I know what it is like to have those worries while trying to fight the disease. It is extremely difficult to provide for the family when your income gets cut by 50% with no way to gain back money you have to have. Fortunately, I had family and friends who bailed my ass and my families’ out. Not everyone is so lucky……

  50. Jennifer – I often find myself in the unenviable position of speaking my mind about subjects most people will duck and cover from. I don’t know why it happens, but it does.

    Saddened – I don’t see anyone getting “dragged” into this. Either you leave your comment and I respond and that’s the end of it, or you write your own blog post about and invite yourself into the fray. Explain to me why an illness excuses libel or slander or threats?

    Crys – I fail to see how inviting her reader list and twitter followers and friends to call for my crucifixion for a perceived insult is somehow acceptable but my defending myself against false accusations and blatant insults is not.

    othurme – This reminds me a lot of writing a post condemning blog drama all the while linking to the blogs in question and commenting there. I feel like I’m in Sunday School all over again.

    Hilly – Unfortunately it seems that I am the only person who is getting that message thrown in his face. Where are the people at Lisa’s blog telling her that she overreacted and should be the “bigger person?” Everyone is holding me to some higher standard that they themselves can’t uphold.

    Karl – again… where is your comment to Lisa saying this? Where is your comment that says “You were wrong wrong wrong?”

    Eliza – Preaching to the choir dear.