Apr 30

The Jester Show April 30, 2008

Wednesdays at 7pm PTWell it finally happened… I hosted a show and my co-host didn’t show up. I sincerely hope Hellohahanarf is well, because I haven’t heard from her yet.

At any rate, Hilly, Karl, Shiny, Lee, Absurdist, and Winterheart bailed me out and called in.

We discussed a lot of topics, including whether or not you can sleep with a friend and keep your relationship, TequilaCon, Bacon!, The Jester Gathering happening on May 10th, and I cornered a couple of them into answering the question “Which bloggers would you do?”

It was a fun show that you should really listen through all the way to the end, because if you skip out before it’s over, you’ll miss Hilly saying:

[audio:SnackieCry.mp3]

http://www.jestertunes.com/audio/SnackieCry.mp3 – (For your records)

I believe you all now have a new ringtone to load onto your phone for TequilaCon.

You’re welcome.

There will be no Jester Show next week, as I’m going to be at a concert.

The show will resume on May 14th with Tracy (TSM_Oregon) at the NEW TIME of 9PM!

Fucking BTR and their stupid fucking rules.

Apr 30

The Jester Show tonight!

Wednesdays at 7pm PTMan… I meant to post about this week’s show a few days ago and I completely spaced it out.

Join me and my special guest, Hellohahanarf on The Jester Show tonight. I have NO idea what we’re going to talk about, but I can assure you it will be entertaining.

I need your help keeping my time slot… I’m being told I don’t have enough listeners to maintain a “primetime” show. (I”m averaging around 100 listeners per show) I don’t know how many it takes, but it would be super cool and awesome if you could come (even just for a little while) and bring your friends.

7pm Pacific time.

Apr 30

Revenge shall be sweeeet

Mr. Fabulous should watch his back.

Be careful not to drop the soap, Fabby.

Wait. You’ll like that.

I’ll come up with something.

Trust me.

Apr 30

American Idol Season Seven: Top Five Perform

American IdolTonight’s theme: the songs of Neil Diamond. I’ve been a fan of Neil Diamond for a million years it seems.

I know some of you think that makes me completely uncool.

Fuck you.

Jason Castro
is up first with “Forever in Blue Jeans.” This is a great choice for him. It suits his personality quite well. I would have rather heard him be a bit more powerful on the chorus. It was just a bit weaker than I wanted. The judges don’t get the chance to speak until after the contestant’s second number.

David Cook chose “I’m Alive” which is a lesser known Diamond song. David’s spin on it, making it faster and grungy was a great interpretation. His voice was great, the performance was energetic and I’m sure he’ll sail through.

Brooke White picked “I’m A Believer” for her first song. She’s playing the guitar and looks like she’s having a much better time this week than last. She was dealt a pretty heavy blow with the past two weeks theme. Neil Diamond is right up her alley. I really like seeing her have fun. She sounded great and looked comfortable again.

David Archuleta‘s first song is “Sweet Caroline.” I hate what he’s done to the melody right off the bat. He cut out the minor chords in the chorus. He left out the signature melody line and replaced it with a generic Stevie Wonder run.

Syesha Mercado selected “Hello Again” for her first song. This was from “The Jazz Singer.” I’m really not feeling this at all. Besides the fact that she had several flat notes, the fact that she had to alter the melody to hit all the notes really bugs me.

Randy’s notes on the first song: Jason was just ok. David Cook was strong. Brooke better than last week. Archuleta was the bomb. Syesha was strong.

Paula’s notes on the first song: Jason “loved the lower register” (she thought he did both songs already); David was fantastic. Brooke was great. (Simon cut her off)

Simon’s notes on the first song: Jason forgettable, Cook above average, Brooke nightmare, Archuleta amateurish, Syesha old fashioned.

Ok I really hate the judges not getting to say their piece. How can they expect the contestants to take advice they don’t get?

Jason’s second song is “September Morn.” This is a much better performance than his first song. He stuck closer to the melody and the song allowed him to really play up his sexy eye stare into the camera. Randy thought it was just “ok.” Paula thought it was too safe. Simon thought it was forgettable and didn’t like that he stuck so closely to the original arrangement.

David Cook’s second song is “All I Really Need is You.” This song totally sounds like it was something he wrote. It was perfect for his style. This could totally be a hit right now for David. I think it will sell well tomorrow on iTunes. This performance might have won him the whole show. Randy called it “blazing.” Paula loved that he picked two songs that were lesser known and said she’s already looking at the American Idol. Simon said the first song was “ok” but the second song was “brilliant.”

Brooke’s second song “I Am I Said.” She’s at the piano this time. I hate the lyric change, since Arizona is not on a different shore than LA. That was terrible advice from Neil. I liked the performance. Randy said, “Nice job!” Paula loved the vulnerability. Simon really hated the first song, but the second song is the “Brooke we like. Well done.”

David Archuleta picked “America” for his second song. I don’t really care for the song choice. It’s kind of manipulative, much like Kristy Lee Cook’s “God Bless The USA” fiasco earlier this season. His voice is cracking a bit. I don’t think he’s in the best voice this week. I hated it. Randy thought he is “in the zone.” Paula thought it was the perfect song choice for him. Simon called it a smart choice of song.

Syesha is closing the show with “Thank the Lord for the Nighttime.” She’s trying to channel Beyonce from Dreamgirls. It’s not working for me. Her pitch is all over the place. It always has been problematic for her. This was a lot like a commercial jingle. Randy thought it was in the zone. Paula thought her first song was beautiful. The second song she compared to Minnie Riperton. Simon thought she was a very good actress/singer but that she may be in trouble tonight.

Here’s the recap:

Safe:
David Cook
David Archuleta

Danger Danger:
Brooke White
Jason Castro

Bye Bye:
Syesha Mercado

I’m so disappointed in tonight’s show. I hated the format. These are some great songs and outside of David Cook, I don’t think anyone really connected with their songs. What do you think?

Apr 29

The Jester’s Gathering in Sacramento!

While I was on Hilly’s show on Sunday, she mentioned that she would be coming to Sacramento on May 10th. We made tentative plans to get together as a small group.

In the past two days, many other people have expressed an interest in meeting up with us.

So… I’m willing to make phone calls and reservations etc, but I’d like some ideas of where we should go. I was originally thinking of dinner some place and then maybe hitting a club… but with a larger group, that may not work as well.

TequilaCon is being held at a bowling alley in Philadelphia… we could find a similar venue here if that’s what we want to do…

Basically, what I’m saying is: Leave me some ideas of what we could all do!!!

People who have expressed an interest (so far) in coming (and may or may not be able to make it):

  • Jester & UMB (of course)
  • Othurme
  • Hilly & her sister
  • Foo
  • Dickie Maxx & Kitty Nibbles
  • Lee and Sly
  • Branden
  • Kentucky Girl
  • Winter
  • Ginamonster

So yeah – Give me some ideas… and also, let me know if you’re gonna try to attend. I’m pointing at all the other bay area people who check me out (Lisa, Kristy, Danny, DanNation…).

I’ll post full details once some consensus is reached later this week.

Apr 29

Jester’s Not Here Man

He’s guest posting over at Miss Britt’s. You should totally click over and check out the story of his Little Grey Buddy.

Apr 28

My Weekend

Outside of the craziness that was the BTR circuit on Sunday, I had a very eventful weekend.

Othurme has written a post that sums it up pretty well.

The only thing he left out was the fact that I am hobbling around like an 80 year old man because I really REALLY got into our performance in San Francisco.

Apr 28

I am Jester’s…

…slutty Blog Talk Radio Show Personality.

I started my day being a last minute special guest on Hilly’s show. It was my mission to make sure I brought enough controversy to the show that she might get slapped with that dreaded “Adults Only” tag. In fact, my mission for the entire day became to spread my special ability to turn any conversation on any topic into a frank discussion of butt sex. Snackie’s Show was a huge (a)rousing success.

Immediately after Hilly’s show, I popped over to catch Fab’s show and that decision completely altered my plans for the rest of the afternoon.

It started out as a simple joke that I played on Mr. Fabulous during his show. I simply called in to inform him that his subscription to “Little Tits” magazine had expired. What transpired next was completely spontaneous.

Fab’s guest, Vulgar Wizard, is normally the co-host of another show with a guy named “Irrelephant.” Irrelephant’s show runs opposite Fab’s. Vulgar Wizard offered me $50 to call into her normal show and play the same joke on Irrelephant.

Othurme happened to be at my house during the BTR marathon, and he rushed into the back room and thrust his cell phone into my hand so that I could make the phone call and not drop my Skype connection with Fab’s show. (I realize I could have done a conference call, but the howling laughter from Fab and his listeners would have made my job impossible.) I called in to the show and well, here’s what happened (Potentially NSFW):

[audio:irrelephantcall.mp3]

As soon as Fab’s show was over, Vulgar Wizard jumped over to Irrelephant’s show for a decompress:

[audio:irrelephant2.mp3]

And then… I’m not sure if they were aware that the show was still being recorded, but there was some spirited conversation after the “sign-off.”

[audio:Irrelephant3.mp3]

Wait. Did you hear that? I want you to focus on just this section:

[audio:raginghomosexual.mp3]

After I invaded Turnbaby’s show, a small group of us decided that we weren’t quite ready to call it a day. That’s when The Jester Roll was born. So Shiny, Hellohahanarf, Othurme, Winter and I picked a show at random to jump into.

We landed in what I can only describe as Nascar central.

The hosts of the show seemed to take the phone call and influx of strangers in the chat room in stride. At least one of the members in the chat room was not thrilled that a big fag had arrived to disrupt their sports talk.

We WILL be Jester Rolling again in the very near future. Stay tuned for details.

I’m still waiting on my $50 from Vulgar Wizard.

Apr 27

Catch me on Snackie Radio

Hey Gang – You know that chick, Hilly, who I hold responsible for getting me slapped with an “adults only” label on BlogTalkRadio?

Yeah… well her guest canceled on her, and *I* am going to be appearing on her show this week, and I’ve got some payback to throw her way.

Her show is on at 3pm Pacific Time today!

Listen in, won’t you?
Snackie Radio featuring Jestertunes

Apr 27

A Craigslist “Oh Shit” Moment

As seen on Craigslist -Austin:

Mom, I know you’re there.
Date: 2008-03-11, 4:38PM CDT

Mom, I know you’re out there, reading this.

How do I know you’re out there?

Let’s begin with that ad of mine that you recently responded to, shall we? You know the one I’m talking about. It was entitled, “Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me?—m4w–22” That ad ran for three days before I got a response, and I can’t tell you, Mom, how my heart fell when I saw the photo that accompanied the response. It was your Realtor’s headshot, the one on your business card. Even worse was the text of your response. I’m so, so sorry I know now what you’d do to me if we ever “hooked up.” On the other hand, Dad must’ve been a very, very lucky guy back in the day. I dunno, maybe he still is.

I guess, Mom, when I think a bit about it, that I should resign myself to whatever it is that you are doing. After all, you’re an adult and I’m an adult. I can’t tell you what you should do with your life.

But Mom, I’d like to raise a few points.

The first point I’d like to raise is that you’re still married to Dad. Please, please PLEASE tell me that you have his blessing. My mind is reeling now, hoping that you’re not the people who posted “Fun Couple Looking For Others—MW4MW—57” I have a sneaking suspicion, though, that it is you. Now that I know you’re cruising CE, I suspect that there aren’t too many other 57 year old swingers from the Westlake area posting on Craigslist.

The second point I’d like to raise is that you owe it to whoever you’re trying to hook up with to be honest. I mean, I lived with you and Dad for 18 years. You’re not that fun.

Finally, I’d like you to stop responding to my “College Stud Needs a MILF—m4w—22” ads. The only one who should find you to be MILF-y at all is Dad. For me, you are just an “M”. Got it?

Your son.

PS. I’m going to swing by at around 7-7:30-ish to do a load of wash, is that okay? I tried to call you at the office, but they kept telling me that you’re busy.